Listen, we're bona fide, we're not from London. Withnail: The paragon of animals. You lose, you gain. Youre not in the same boat. We live in a land of weather forecasts and breakfasts that set in, shat on by Tories, shovelled up by Labour, and here we are, we three; perhaps the last island of beauty in the world. Withnail: [takes pill out of doll] Trade: Pheno-dihydrochloride-benzorex. And you'd be marvellous. I don't consciously offend big men like this. We live in a land of weather forecasts and breakfasts that set in. He told me about your problems. He's so mauve, we don't know what he's planning! Withnail: Withnail: It's you he wants. Isaac Parkin: I think the carrot infinitely more fascinating than the geranium. Marwood: That's a very good idea. My brain's capsizing. I know where you are, you're at Crow Crag. Not the attitude I'd been given to expect from the H.E. If I hadn't told him you were active we'd never have got the cottage. He can eat his ****ing radish. Withnail : Right, you fucker, I'm going to do the washing up! Then they must be delighted with your career. You fill this with piss, take this pipe down the trouser and sellotape this valve to the end of the old chap. Alright, we're going to have to work quickly. I'm a friend of Montague Withnail's. If you can't find anything, bring in the shed. Jake: Now look, you. Street: The Embalmer! Oh, look at this little bastard. I might fetch you up a rabbit. Any minute now he's going to rush out and get into his tights. Well, I'd hardly say that. Marwood: The older order changeth, yielding place to new. Uncle Monty: It is the most shattering experience of a young man's life when one morning he awakes and quite reasonably says to himself, "I will never play the Dane.". I dislike relatives in general and in particular mine. What on Earth are those? Have you had any training in the martial arts? [eyes filling with tears] Where did you school? Danny: We can't go on like this. Danny's a genius. I must go home at once and discuss his problems in depth. Making enemies of our own futures. Withnail: Bastard asked me to understudy Konstantin in The Seagull. But no man's put me down yet. Oh dear, no, no, no, I'd be sucked into his trap. Jake: How like an angel in apprehension. I've told you why. No fridges, no televisions, no phones! Oh, but how dreadful. Come on, old boy. If I hear more words out of you, I'll put one of these here black pods on you. Sherry? Yeah, I know, but I got the logs in. Then why's he wearing that old suit? St Peter preached the epistles to the apostles looking like that. We've just run out of wine. I sense there is world play but I just don't get it. Throwing themselves into the road to escape all this hideousness! I often wonder where Norman is now. Hello? I'm good-looking. Anyway, I loathe those Russian plays. You don't deserve such loyalty. We live in a kingdom of reigns, where royalty comes in gangs. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. I'm utterly arseholed. Withnail: . I'm starving. Prostitutes for the bees. Withnail: Two quid? Withnail: The wankers don't drink it because they can't afford it! Look at Geoff Woade! No, no, you can't. You got a rush. Course you have, you're the poacher. Withnail: Right you f***er, I'm going to do the washing up! We've got to get some booze. I'm gonna be a star*! We're working on a film up here. The movie, which takes place in England in late 1969, involves the misadventures of a pair of chronically unemployed actors. Forgive me, it was inconsiderate of me not to have telegrammed. Withnail: You been away? General: Marwood: "I f*** arses"? Amy Audrey Locke's 1912 In Praise of Winchester offers an anthology of over 100 pages of prose and verse about Winchester College. He went to the other place, Monty. I think the carrot infinitely more fascinating than the geranium. I think there may be something living in there, I think there may be something alive. Much more of this and I'm going to apply for meals on wheels. You are invited to spend an hilarious weekend in the English countryside. You dont deserve such loyalty. Withnail: Monty: She got a doll on Christmas what pisses itself. 2 quotes have been tagged as withnail-i: Bruce Robinson: 'We've gone on holiday by mistake' and Bruce Robinson: 'Here. Withnail: (Wry smile) Sorry about that. Tea Shop Proprietor: How can it be so cold in here? Excuse me, we were wondering if we could purchase a pheasant off of you? What do you want in here? moment in a TV show, movie, or music video you want to share. Withnail: We want the finest wines available to humanity, we want them here and we want them now! [referring to the radish on Monty's lapel] Then it was a rodent. Im in a park and Im practically dead. Cooking's one of the natural instincts. They dont like me being on stage. It is called a Camberwell Carrot. Danny: You're looking very beautiful, man. We'll be found dead in here next spring. Withnail: "In a world exclusive interview, 33 year old shot putter Geoff Woade who weighs 317 pounds, admitted taking massive doses of anabolic steroids, drugs banned in sport. Here, I dont want it. quotes duty call warfare modern war. You are invited to spend an hilarious weekend in the English countryside. Marwood stands there, petrified, the bull is scraping the ground with its front hoof, snorting, he throws the shopping the air and it scatters in the mud. Withnail: Throw yourself into the road, darling! Man delights not me, no, nor women neither. For some of us a quote becomes a mantra, a goal or a philosophy by which we live. Danny: Monty: [pulling back the lace curtain] Danny: What happened to your cigar commercial? Jesus Christ. Waitress: We worked out it would be very handy karma for him to get hold of a suit. Marwood: Stop saying that, Withnail, of course he's the f***ing farmer! We're in the middle of a f***ing gale. . Even the wankers on the site wouldn't drink that! You need working on, boy! [teary-eyed] We get in there and get wrecked, then we'll eat a pork pie, then we'll drop a couple of Surmontil-50's each. You can use the left-hand menu to view some of the most popular quotes from the main Withnail and I characters . Uncle Monty: (referring to his cat) Yet again that oaf has destroyed my day! [whispering] Monty: I've looked into it. Withnail: You just wait. It's horrible really but they like that, the little girls. One of us has got to stay on guard. He gags and gasps]. Will we never be set free? [picking up an apron] Withnail: I do. Withnail: [narrating over scene] Withnail: His head must weigh fifty pounds on its own. Don't be ridiculous. Withnail: (Appalled) How dare you! No, no, no, dear boy, you must leave, you must leave. General: Jake: Top 65 Best Nikola Tesla Quotes On Energy & Success 2023, Top 70 Bengals Trivia Quiz Questions And Answers 2023, Top 68 March Trivia Quiz Questions And Answers 2023, Top 57 Airplane Trivia Quiz Questions And Answers 2023, Top 65 Philippine Literature Quiz Trivia Questions And Answers, Top 62 Chemistry Trivia Quiz Questions And Answers 2023, Top 63 Biology Trivia Quiz Questions And Answers 2023. Be seated. This is a British cult classic. In this case, it most certainly would not. Why don't you go back? [cheerfully hopping back over the wall] And we want them here, and we want them now! The greatest decade in the history of mankind is over. If you don't leave, we'll call the police. I've only had a few ales. Just you wait! How can we make it die? "Boy lands plum role for top Italian director" Course he does! And now I'm calling you one. Withnail: I'll show the lot of you! Little tarts, they love it! Marwood: by Anonymous: reply 16: February 3, 2021 10:58 PM: I've gone on holiday by mistake. Withnail: Surrounded by trees and nature one feels a *glorious* stirring on the senses, a rejection of *poisonous* inhibition, and a *fecund* motion of the soul. He had a weight under his fez. Withnail: [narrating over scene] I'm in a park and I'm practically dead; what good's the countryside? STANDS4 LLC, 2023. Withnail: Scrubbers! Pin By Lucy MckFunkdrick On Sunny Side | Withnail And I, Mens www.pinterest.com. [Heckles pedestrian] Throw yourself into the road, darling, you haven't got a chance! Get any more masculine than him and you'd have to live up a tree. Yarn is the best way to find video clips by quote. The fucking kettle's on fire! Then why has my head gone numb? Marwood: Withnail: Marwood: He's right, Withnail, look at him! [shouts out of the car window at a man standing on the pavement]. Withnail: I'm a trained actor reduced to the status of a bum! Look at that, accident black spot! Because I want to walk you to the station. Withnail hands Marwood the bag of shopping and jumps over the wall to safety. What we need is harmony, fresh air, stuff like that., Flowers are essentially tarts. [a few minutes later, Withnail re-enters the cottage holding a wet stick]. Sons are the anchors of a mother's life. Monty: Withnail: I feel like a pig shat in my head. Marwood: [eating chips while taking a bath] Ive got your saveloy. "Withnail and I Quotes." There is a hare tied to the door with a note attached. Prostitutes for the bees. Marwood: Withnail: Withnail: We are not drunks, we are multimillionaires! And yet, to me, what is this quintessence of *dust*? [voiceover] We are indeed drifting into the arena of the unwell. Withnail: Look at this; accident blackspot? What have you found? Well, that can't be sensible, can it? Well, it's not my fault if the system doesn't work! [to Marwood] Tactical necessity. So, there's this judge sitting there in a cape like fucking Batman with this really rather far-out looking hat. Listen, Withnail, it's a stinker. I shall miss you too. Uncle Monty: Here hare here here hare here! Headhunter to everyone. Be seated. Why can't I have an audition? Monty: Here hare here. is the clip Thanks! Marwood: Why don't you wash up occasionally like any other human being? Withnail: Danny: Don't get uptight with me, man. I need at least an hour for lunch. I've looked into it. And yet, to me, what is this quintessence of dust? Jake: We'll tell him they had a farmers' conference and had a run on them. Finally, the Withnail And I script is here for all you quotes spouting fans of the Richard E. Grant movie. The carrot has mystery. Withnail: I could take double anything you could! Withnail: Withnail: Listen, we're bona fide, we're not from London. Give it a chance. Marwood: Suits me. Tea Shop Proprietor: When I strike they won't know what hit them! [Withnail picks up a bottle of lighter fluid]. C*nt give him two years. How *dare* you! When I come in, I seen one the size of a fucking dog. Cos if you do, I'll have to give you a dose of medicine. I could take double anything you could. Marwood: Suits me. Monty: I recommend you smoke some more grass. How dare you! What have you done to them? I'm glad you're the proprietor, I was gonna have to have a word with you anyway. Withnail: (Stirring) I deny all accusations. Brings back such memories of Oxford. These are the sort of windows faces look in at! How dare you. [approaching the pub] And the Coalman looks at him and says, "Do you think you look normal, Your Honour?" We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts . It is a bond filled with trust, unconditional love, understanding, and support. by Anonymous: . I feel dreadful, I feel really dreadful. It is the most shattering experience of a young man's life when one morning he awakes and quite reasonably says to himself, "I will never play the Dane. Danny: Oh, Baudelaire. Marwood: I wondered if you could sell us some food. Marwood: Flowers are essentially tarts. You don't understand. One of us has got to stay on guard. [he picks up the kettle on the stove. Withnail: Ive told you why. Monty: You bloody fool, you should never mix your drinks! [reading a newspaper] How come Monty owns such a horrible little shack? No, man, this was more like a long white hat. I don't care where you come from! Danny: Withnail: There is, youll agree, a certain je ne sais quoi oh so very special about a firm, young carrot.. Monty: [getting up at the same time] Jesus Christ! Keep your bag up. 4 Mar. Why trust one drug and not the other? The Withnail and I film script contains a virtually non-stop array of one-liners from all the main characters - and for this reason the film is often touted as being one of the most quotable films ever made. Throwing themselves into the road gladly to escape all this hideousness! She said she'd closed. Look at my tongue, it's wearing a yellow sock. Withnail: I never thought he'd come all this way. Why have you drugged their onions?! You haven't slept in sixty hours, you're in no state to tackle it. Monty: Well, of course you dont, you are incapable of indulging in anything but pleasure, am I not right? Withnail: I'll swallow it and run a mile! I'm in considerable danger here, I must get out of here at once. You can stuff it up your arse for nothing and fuck off while you're doing it! The Coalman had to go to Jamaica. Half an hour? His head must weight fifty pounds on its own. Do you know, when you first came in here I knew you were a services man. If you're hanging on to a rising balloon, you're presented with a difficult decision let go before it's too late or hang on and keep getting higher, posing the question: how long can you keep a grip on the rope? It's obsessed with its gut. I've been watching you, especially you, prancing like a tit. They're selling hippie wigs in Woolworth's, man. Marwood: I didn't call you inhumane. Withnail: 'Scuse me. [in a telephone box, speaking to an operator] All hairdressers are in the employment of the government. Here."" (Richard Griffiths) "Laisse-moi, respirer . 1 likes. There's the supper. 2010 Drama 24M views 2 years ago Uncle Monty - the end of an age ohheckforgotusername 157K views 11 years ago Withnail & I 30. Withnail And I - Wikipedia en.m.wikipedia.org. Withnail & I is in my personal Top 5 movies of all time for re-watchablity and scathing dialogue. "I'm gonna pull you head off." An expert on bulls you are not! Politics, man. Headhunter to his friends. He won't gore you. : Withnail and I. I find the quote read by Monty from the note written by the poacher very usable: "Here, Hare, here." Surely Herr Hare Here. No fridges, no televisions, no phones. I feel unusual. Marwood: Monty: I've been to drama school. It's society's crime, not ours. We can't go on like this. I'll sleep here. Talk:Withnail and I. They can handle the caftan but they cannot handle the bell. Monty: How infinite in faculties! "It's gone. [pulling some goo out of the sink] That is an unfortunate political decision. Shut that gate and keep it shut! Withnail: Free to those who can afford it, very expensive to those who can't. Withnail: (Ranting on a mountain) Bastards! Marwood: Uncle Monty: Here hare here here hare here! Withnail: Withnail: Who says it's a Camberwell Carrot? No, I haven't got another. You'll have to find us first. I invented it in Camberwell, and it looks like a carrot. Withnail: Good old Jake. you little traitors. Uncle Monty: I sometimes wonder where Norman is now. Balls! We don't want a rabbit, we want a pheasant. "I'm going to pull your head off, because I don't like your head.". Danny's here. You haven't got a chance! I assure you I'm not, officer. No! This is a device enabling the drunken driver to operate in absolute safety. It's society's crime, not ours. The man was fined $10,000 and was ordered to pay $1,843 in restitution to Maine. Here are found the emeralds, sapphires, carbuncles, topazes, chrysolites, onyxes, beryls, sardius, and other costly stones. You're looking very beautiful, man. Hello? Keep back, keep back! Survey of rural types. You know what we should do? Marwood: [on top of a hill, shouting into a valley, his voice echoing] Maybe he f***s arses! Is Marwood in love with Withnail? https://www.quotes.net/movies/withnail_and_i_quotes_14074. Withnail: *What are you doing prowling around in the middle of the fucking night*? Danny: Withnail: Listen, I think you should strangle it instantly in case it starts trying to make friends with us. Monty: [spits onto the ground] Withnail: Old suit?! Withnail: Half dead he may be, but I'll come up after you, and I'll wake you up with a live one. Marwood: Matter. STANDS4 LLC, 2023. Now, come along, Im going to teach you how to peel a potato., I must have some booze. So here we are gonna talk about some of thebest quotes from the movie. But sooner or later you've got to get out because it's crashing. I think we've been in here too long. The greatest decade in the history of mankind is over. Danny: Marwood: It's you he wants. Withnail and I is a 1986 film comedy written and directed by Bruce Robinson and starring Richard E. Grant (Withnail), Paul McGann (Marwood, the "I" of the title), Richard Griffiths (Uncle Monty) and Ralph Brown (Danny). [gesturing at the wine bottles and Marwood in the back] Time change. Just run at it! *Fork it*! move forward or backward to get to the perfect spot. And if I spike you, you'll know you've been spoken to. I assure you I'm not [drunk], officer, honestly. Withnail: No you can't, I can't get my boots on when they're hot. We might wanna do a film in here. Marwood: You know what we should do? Danny: Jesus Christ, this huge, thatched head with its earlobes and cannonball is now considered sane. I have of late, but wherefore I know not, lost all my mirth. Withnail: Look at me, I'm 30 in a month and I've got a sole flapping off my shoe. My thumbs have gone weird! Marwood: He can eat his fucking radish. These eels here are for his pot. Start shouting. What goods the countryside? We worked out it would be handy karma for him to get hold of a suit but he's a very low temperature spade, the Coalman. Why can't I get on television? They walk down to the cottage. Danny: Here.". I'd never have wanted it, not with him in it! Will we never be set free? Danny: I want something's flesh! Thanks! This most excellent canopy, the air, look you, this brave o'erhanging firmament, this majestical roof fretted with golden fire, why, it appeareth nothing to me but a foul and pestilent congregation of vapors! A cat, rain, Vim under the sink, and both bars on. I feel unusual. Two out-of-work actors -- the anxious, luckless Marwood and his acerbic, alcoholic friend, Withnail -- spend their days drifting between their squalid flat, the unemployment office and the pub. It is the most shattering experience of a young man's life when one morning he awakes and quite reasonably says to himself "I will never play the Dane." Withnail: This was more like a long white hat. [holding up a pill] Imagine getting into a fight with the fucker! I must go home at once and discuss his problems in depth. Marwood: A coward you are, Withnail! [to Marwood] He leans up close to her, speaking into to her hearing aid, Mr Parkin is sitting on his tractor with one leg wrapped from thigh to ankle in a plastic fertiliser bag. [voiceover] My brain's capsizing, I've gotta unfuck my brain! The wankers don't drink it because they can't afford it. I'm in the middle of a bloody overdose! It's impossible to use 12 papers on one joint. You beastly little parasite, how dare you! Hair are your aerials. [shouting at his cat] Maybe he's written this in some moment of drunken sincerity. [amorously puts his hand on Marwood's arm as he peels vegetables] Listen to me, listen to me! General: He is even taller than Withnail and much more burly. Listen to me, listen to me! Marwood: [Contemplating how to kill a chicken for supper] It's got dreadful beady eyes, they stare at you. Goes into court in his caftan and a bell. [a live chicken is standing on the table]. Withnail: Nonsense, this is a far superior drink to meths! I'm in a park and I'm practically dead. Dosed 'em. Withnail: Clearly a myth. [the bull is scraping the ground with its front hoof, snorting]. He can eat his ****ing radish. Withnail: Ah! Withnail: You've got soup. Something's got to be done. Sinew in nicotine base. It's trying to get itself in with you. Trade: Phenodihydrochloride benzorex. Browse Recommendations; Choice Awards; Genres; Giveaways; New Releases; Genres Monty: Oh no, we'd be sucked into his trap! Withnail: How can it be so cold in here? Come on lads, let's get home. Danny: If I medicined you, you'd think a brain tumour was a birthday present! Danny: Please don't. And as Presuming Ed here has so consistently pointed out, we have failed to paint it black. echosmith cool quotes lyrics kid song yah crowd she straight lyric follow quotesgram sees them lines bord kiezen he sydney He used to pick on me. Oh dear no no No, I'd be sucked into his trap! Those are the kind of windows faces look in at. Withnail: You've got soup. The thermostats. [removing his sunglasses] My heart's beating like a fucked clock! Hello? Withnail: [Jake has left a dead hare hanging on the cottage door, along with a note], Monty: Jake: Withnail: Withnail: Withnail: Would it be in bad form to plagiarise a toast? Withnail: I'm not having this shag-sack insulting me! Prostitutes for the bees. Your email address will not be published. There are things in there, there's a tea-bag growing! Withnail: Look here, my cousin's a QC! London is a country coming down from its trip. Withnail: Don't threaten me with a dead fish! Withnail and I is a 1986 film comedy written and directed by Bruce Robinson and starring Richard E. Grant (Withnail), Paul McGann (Marwood, the "I" of the title), Richard Griffiths (Uncle Monty) and Ralph Brown (Danny). Headhunter to his friends. I hope you guys like our collection. It's true, I crept the boards in my youth. Add spice to it. The movie, which takes place in England in late 1969, involves the misadventures of a pair of chronically unemployed actors. He slams it shut and slumps against it, shaken]. Marwood: Well, I don't know. You want me to call whatshisname and ask him about his house? [fondling the money Monty has given them to buy Wellingtons] Find your neutral space. I was gonna cook onions. Shat on by Tories, shovelled up by Labour. 10 quotes from Withnail and I: the Original Screenplay: 'We are indeed drifting into the arena of the unwell.' . Thought I was going for a minute. Isaac Parkin: Withnail: There is, you'll agree, a certain 'je ne sais quoi' oh so very special about a firm, young carrot. You got a rush. The only people he converses with are his clients, and occasionally the police. Withnail: I've only had a few ales. Black puddings are no good to us. [Withnail laughs hysterically and falls to the floor, then vomits on Marwood's feet], Withnail: [staggering out] It will die, it will die! Marwood: save. A mother is the truest friend we have, when trials, heavy and sudden, fall upon us. Warm up? How dare you tell him that?! You shouldn't treat each other so badly. It won't be the first time I've been left with the couch. I don't know what's in here. Withnail: Speed, is like a dozen transatlantic flights without ever getting off the plane Time change. He told me that first day you came to Chelsea. We're incompatible. They're selling hippie wigs in Woolworths, man. Imagine the size of his balls. Look at this - accident blackspot?

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