If my ear were a cunt I could fuck it! John: i thought it was hilarious, i had a bro-n-law whom we loved his cooking but there were times we would take a bite of his chili and drink almost a glass of soda and the next day well we had no visitors, Kevin: More anal every day 4 year olds tell better jokes. lol! There was a young lady from Vanvaper, "There once was a man . Math not your thing? ha ha thanks nell, Hi, funmontreagirl, thanks most of its from history, but I did add a few! Nithya Venkat from Dubai on May 28, 2014: Enjoyed reading, great limericks! https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/There_once_was_a_man_from_Nantucket Still, that's not definitive. / For he said, As a rule, / When the weather turns cool, / I invariably get in a stew.. Did she think on that bucket Who went with a girl in a hedge, Nell Rose (author) from England on November 18, 2010: Hi, Doug, thanks for reading it, I love Limericks too, I was going to add a lot more, but couldn't find any innocent ones! Female versionThere once was a girl from Nantucket. When he sells, all that cash hell just truck it! He said with a grin they are funny aren't they? A man and a woman started to have sex in the middle of a dark forest. Today is all about word play and rhymesto celebrate the birthday of English artist and writer Edward Lear. But his daughter, named Nan, Ran away with a man And as for the bucket, Nantucket. This town is one of the settings from the famous book Moby Dick, and in the 19th century, it was the whaling capital of the world. Where songs were sung, and the bawdiness of the drunken man and the strumpet inn keeper's daughter brought a new type of poetry mixed with hilarity and this is what made the chorus change and of course brought us the famous Limerick .All because people had had too much to drink!. You may recall learning about limericks (or even writing a few of your own) in grade school. Just what I needed to perk me up and make me smile. I penned this short verse, and with luck it funmontrealgirl from Montreal on September 28, 2011: Fantastic. John Ryan, Haverill, MA. We are sorry for Nan, Your email address will not be published. She ate the green cheese There once was a man from Nantucket Who kept all his cash in a bucket. A keen scented veteran of Tachoma, Ron U. Austin, TX 826 friends 768 reviews An elderly man comes in to see his Doctor. The New York Exchange went one step further with the third rhyme, and the Pawtucket Times took over from there. The incredible Wizard of Oz / Retired from his business because / Due to up-to-date science / To most of his clients / He wasnt the Wizard he was. lol! There are two versions. There once was a man from Nantucket . Who had one so long he could suck it. As he wiped off his chin Which distressed all the people of Chertsey. yes limericks are hard to write, but fun though! your a poet but I bet you didn't know it! I've built a little API-as-a-Service platform that makes it easy to create an API and deploy it to a private cloud. But his daughter, named Nan, I told you it's my job to suck it! Nantucket, but she'll have to give it back! Cheers. Wherever did you find them all? Cash flows through my bucket, a sieve. The rocket went bang There once was a man from Nantucket Whose dick was so long he could suck it To save a lot of trouble He put it in double But instead of cumming, he went! Madeline Begun Kane aka Mad Kane Trump the Game Plan by Michael R. Burch aka "The Loyal Opposition" There once was a huckster named Trump who liked to be kissed on the rump. This is funny and amusing, I enjoyed your work very much. And instead of coming he went! These are so funny. Exchange, Of this story we hear from Nantucket, Read up on even more bad jokes youll just have to laugh at. We have more brie-lliant cheese puns where this came from! Merry Meet My Friends here's to the Ale and the Bawdiness! Amazing Funny Facts and Crazy Statistics! I have looked everywhere for the photo, but this was before we were told to add links, and I wish I had now, I think, If I remember right, that I put in google search something like tavern wench, but I am not sure, sorry, I will take another look because its driving me mad now! These are a bit saucy and not safe for kids, just the way it should be on this website! For he told a fat girl she was skinny! You've got the whitest teeth I've ever come across. but sorry I will have to take it off because its a bit naughty! The consent submitted will only be used for data processing originating from this website. There was a lewd whore from Nantucket who intended to pee in a bucket; but being a man she missed the damn can and her rattled johns fled, crying: "Fuck it!" Variation on a classic limerick by Michael R. Burch Here's another bawdy Nantucket limerick, author unknown: There once was a man from Nantucket Whose schlong was so long he could sucket " There once was a man from Nantucket " is the first line in many limericks. Just need some Irish beer. For since he was lam There once was a man from Nantucket,Whose dick was so long he could suck it.He said with a grin,As he wiped off his chin,"If my ear was a cunt I would fuck it.". Demas W Jasper from Today's America and The World Beyond on October 22, 2015: (Others elsewhere.) His daughter, named Nan, Ran off with a man, And as for the bucketNan took it. There was a man from Nantucket Whose cock was so long he could suck it He said with a grin As he wiped off his chin If my ear were a cunt I could fuck it! I of course, know that you will be very sensible and just add sweet little poems! The woman says, "Me too, you've been eating grass for the past ten minutes!". LOL LOL hahahaha these limericks are priceless. Limericks are always good, racy fun. Try these physics jokes. Thanks for that Nell. Funny Jokes; Top Rated; Most Discussed. Please delete comment if too rude for your hub. Stole the money and ran, sligobay from east of the equator on September 19, 2010: Hi Nell- What a wonderful diversion for an old rugger like me. Manage Settings Sprouted out of his ass And as for the bucket, Manhasset. %%EOF Pawtucket Times, Well, Nan settled down in Assonet. Because of reader demands, we again issue the challenge our readers to write their own chapters. (Only rhymes in the form of limericks will be accepted. He couldnt even go lamp-post pissing! lol! Dirty Jokes, Tasteless, Jokes, Ethnic Jokes . According to language experts, the use of the limerick extends back to the late 18th century. He won my heart, In my limerick hubs I always had some problem getting them past the HP censors and had to change a few. And as for the bucket Nantucket. Whose balls were made of brass I will have to remember that one! :-) They are so fun to read, but also fun to write. Since most sayings are explicit, they may also classify themselves as misogynistic. :)))) (fab. lol glad you liked it, I was just in a funny mood! We are no longer supporting IE (Internet Explorer) as we strive to provide site experiences for browsers that support new web standards and security practices. Therefore, its best to use it in environments where you arent offending other people around you. He said to his girl When Nan and her man went a stealing, I really enjoyed your hub, thank you for sharing. I need a front door for my hall, Just to prove that I do have a bit of culture in me, I thought I would add a few famous limericks by the poet Edward Lear! Today's blog: Build an API from a CSV file in 4 minutes Male versionThere once was a man from Nantucket. There once was a lady named Ferris / Whom nothing could ever embarrass. Who went for a ride in a rocket Funny limericks have been embraced by many countries around the world, but they have a special place in Irish culture. The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers to this website may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website. There was an Old Man of Nantucket. School bus carrying 40 children plunges into creek in French Alps, Ian Wright says he loves Arsenal hero Reiss Nelson as he celebrates epic Bournemouth victory, He can do everything Michael Dawson blown away by Lisandro Martinez as Jeff Stelling rates Man Utd defender, Why VAR didnt award penalty to Arsenal for handball during Bournemouth clash, Man with MS so severe he cannot cut up his own food classed as fit to work, A boy wrote a poem about living with Aspergers and it will break your heart a little, World Poetry Day 2016: The best spring and Easter poems to celebrate poetry day, Do not sell or share my personal information. He said with a grin As he wiped off his chin, "If my ear were a cunt I would fuck it! If youd like a nice pearl So she lifted her dress and said f*** it!. Sure, Nan and her man left and tucket thanks! 'There once was a girl from Nantucket' is the first line from a limerick about a girl who couldn't pay her fare, so she provided a sexual favour instead. Here's a Limerick that I heard in college from a music major. Who thought hed at last found a tight un. It is often used for rhyming as the name fits a number of words. Peter Chubb, Aldeburgh, Suffolk, England, Pa went back to Nantucket, she said with a grin, wipe that cum from your chin. He tried and he tried, and eventually died, that weird little boy named Dan. Thanks for the laughs. cheers nell. The dirty, old man from Nantucket. She (to passing man): Excuse me, do you have the time. With a colourful lack of restraint! It wasn't the spider that crept up beside her, But Little Boy Blue and his horn. (B) Da da dum da da dum Keep writing! Ran away with a man, This is a naughty one.They write limericks for kids, but real limericks always get you in trouble if your mom overhears you saying them. 0 coins. Doing my best to ride the silent, lonely," driving-us-mad,"Wave of isolation!! I feel like writing a few myself. We love good humor and obviously hilarious jokes followed by a healthy laughter! Just take this here oyster and shuck it Though the paper was thin, From my plentiful stash, With a big carving knife, A blue jay! he cried. ha ha cheers nell. There once was a man from Bel Air She no longer used that brown paper! ----- There once was a . Who was doing his wife on the stair Nell Rose (author) from England on February 17, 2017: LOL! Nell Rose (author) from England on August 18, 2010: Hi, Ivorwen, ha ha that's great, I love limericks we have always made up some at home, and I was in a funny mood! glad it made you laugh, thanks! You found some choice ones there, Nell! There once was a girl named Irene / Who lived on distilled kerosene / But she started absorbing / A new hydrocarbon / And since then has never benzene. Suzie from Carson City on April 03, 2020: Hello again, NellPerspy actually challenged me to come back here & write a limerick! lol! There are dozens of examples of rhyming the last word in the limerick. I found this extremely entertaining, thanks for the laughs. The first publication of limericks began in the 18th century, but didnt really gain any popularity until the 19th century. And said Jewels, Dad, tell me where you stuck it. . lol! There was a young sailor named Bates By doing his part, Send us your limericks viahey@metro.co.uk or Tweet us on Twitter @MetroUK and well dd them in. Your limericks are humorous and smart and just the right amount of naughty. Poor old Nan and the man in Alaska. Valheim Genshin Impact Minecraft Pokimane Halo Infinite Call of Duty: Warzone Path of Exile Hollow Knight: Silksong Escape from Tarkov Watch Dogs: Legion. And as for the bucket, Nantucket. He pleasured his bitch licking and kissing, Nell Rose (author) from England on May 02, 2011: Hi, vietnamvet, thanks so much, glad you liked them, cheers nell. I am rather fond of these bawdy little ditties( careful!) And as for their fortune, Dantucket. / Though it may have an eye, / Theres no E dont ask why! (A) Da da dum da da dum da da dum. And now there's little Franky. If you will just roll over, But Pa still owns land "There once was a man from Nantucket" is the opening line for many limericks, in which the name of the island of Nantucket creates often ribald rhymes and puns. Nell Rose (author) from England on September 26, 2011: Hi, rj, lol brilliant! -2 super_ag 7 yr. ago This violates the rules of a limerick where the last line has to rhyme with the first two. Good judgment and tacked, President Joe Biden plans to spend Thanksgiving with his family in Nantucket, a small island off the coast of Cape Cod, Massachusetts, and the inspiration for a limerick that dates back to at. Let's start with a few basics. Bonnie Mitchell, White Plains, NY, The lawyer they hired, Dan Schuckat, the world nutty. Copyright @ 2015 Yesterday's Island, Inc.. All Rights Reserved. But the money he earned, Mantucket Great tufts of fine grass All of are parties were bawdy and limericks were a fixture that induced competition and mixed well with the mud, the blood and the beer. Required fields are marked *, Phrases Similar to There Once was a Girl from Nantucket, Phrases Opposite to There Once was a Girl from Nantucket, Ways People May Say There Once was a Girl from Nantucket Incorrectly, Acceptable Ways to Phrase There Once was a Girl from Nantucket. There Once was a Girl Named Lilly. He was froze from his sole to his hock. this.. Kevin Foley , Vienna, Austria, A birdwatching Brit. But as for the bucket, Pawtucket. It isNational Limerick Day2016 and the jokes are flooding in. The tweet is. Far be it for royalty such as myself to reject a challenge! Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Texas) responded to President Joe Biden's Thanksgiving plans with the first line of a limerick, and Twitter users thought it was a poetic self-own. Because they have cotton balls. Copyright 1999-2023 Ahmad Anvari. Learn how your comment data is processed. He said, Oh my love, in stormy weather, he'd clack them together, and lightning shot out of his ass. Then, it was based upon a well-endowed man. Report as inappropriate 11/26/2017 This Yelper's account has been closed. thanks for reading, and I love the limerick! lol! Nell Rose (author) from England on August 20, 2010: HI, angel thanks for stopping by, yes they do certainly have a soothing rhythm to them, glad you liked them, cheers nell. Princeton Tiger But he followed the pair to Pawtucket, The man and the girl with the bucket; And he said to the man, He was welcome to Nan, But as for the bucket, Pawtucket. Nell Rose (author) from England on May 11, 2020: Umesh Chandra Bhatt from Kharghar, Navi Mumbai, India on May 10, 2020: A nice collection. The limerick has a rhyming structure. Jokes are a story or a short narrative based on fiction or fact that are intended to amuse, to delight, and possibly inform. Nell Rose (author) from England on September 02, 2010: Hi, Micky, ha ha I am glad you liked it, I was going to be ruder but thought I had better not! vietnamvet68 from New York State on April 29, 2011: now these are really cute, I'm surprised I never found them before. Is algebra fruitless endeavor? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- There once was a man from Racine who'd invented a fucking machine. Thank you for a beautiful and funny hub! There once was a boy named Dan, who wanted to fry in a pan. It fits like a glove. For more feathery plays on words, try some of these bird puns that will quack you up. So easy you can use a spreadsheet and launch it in less than 5 minutes. Anyway, off we go, and if anybody has got any good ones, please feel free to add them at the bottom. Ahem. You can use there once was a Girl from Nantucket in several social situations. There was a young fellow named Bob. Which grew from the sides of her twat. These funny limericks use their bouncy rhyme scheme to explore concepts like math, science, and philosophy, and the twisty, punny verses will get you thinkingand giggling! This got her pants wet, Which made her upset, And when it was cold she would freeze. Usually, you rhyme the limerick with other similar explicit words. There once was a man from Nantucket, Who kept all his cash in a bucket. To West Virginia she went, There was a young maid from Madras Bill Briggs, Tusseyville, PA. Before Nan lifted that cash and bucket Whose cock was so long he could suck it Limmericks are always enjoyable. [5] [6] Among the best-known are: But he followed the pair to Pawtucket, The man and the girl with the bucket; This is understandably a very popular hub. Alas, the bucket was found and its great to hear some new ones. I love a good limerick and in particular those of Lear which I think were very clever. There once was a man from NantucketWho kept all his cash in a bucket.But his daughter, named Nan,Ran away with a manAnd as for the bucket, Nantucket. Chicago Tribune Ill get my dog Rover, If you liked this funny limerick, try out some of these food jokes. Nell Rose (author) from England on April 29, 2012: Hi Larry, haha! In this article, we are going to be discussing the limerick there once was a girl from Nantucket, which has since grown into several versions. And practically useless on dates. "There once was a man from Nantucket," Cruz tweeted, linking to a story about Biden's plan to spend Thanksgiving on Nantucket, a tiny island off the coast of Massachusetts. And when she got there, The limerick where the line is from was first written for the Princeton Tiger in 1902. lol glad you liked it, cheers nell. Martin Kloess from San Francisco on June 01, 2012: Nell Rose (author) from England on May 13, 2012: Hi Larry, lol! Princeton Tiger, But he followed the pair to Pawtucket, Let's say you were trapped inside this room. and see Mhatter99 too. Great stuff! Simple Simon met a Pieman, going to the fair. Well it is pretty simple really. I'll try to add one here but it is quite rude so I will edit out one of the words. And as for the bucket, Nantucket. If its money you need, I dont lack it. I wrote one recently that has gone missing, and I wish I could find it. To claim it by law There once was a man from Nantucket, Who kept all of his cash in a bucket, But his daughter, named Nan, Ran away with a man, And as for the bucket, Nantucket. I love limericks, I am always making them up, nell. He said with a grin As he wiped off his chin, "If my ear were . . haha! If my ear was a hole I would fuck it! (A) Da da dum da da dum da da dum But of course, don't you know, the gentility is but a mask, and the funniest jokes are off-color! yes Larry is quite the poet don't you think? There once was a man from Nantucket Who kept all his cash in a bucket He has a daughter named Nan Who ran away with a man And as for the bucket, Nan tuck it romulusnr 7 yr. ago I DVed but then found out that you might be right. My favorite ones have always been about the little boy Willy: Hi, ACSutliff, thanks for liking it, I was going to make it a bit ruder then I thought, no don't push my luck! There once was a man from Boston who bought him a baby austin. (B) Da da dum da da dum One was small, hardly anything at all In search of the infamous bucket. Rob Keister, Fountain Valley, CA, Why all the fuss bout this bucket? An oyster from Kalamazoo / Confessed he was feeling quite blue. Or you could try some of these funny poems instead. Nell Rose (author) from England on September 17, 2012: Hi Mohan, thanks for reading them, my witty little ditties! Grabbed the bucket and ran, dont Juneau. Advised the two people to chuck it Now it goes to school with her, Between two chunks of bread. I had to hit all your buttons because they are "all that".

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